The Timeline's Barely Even a Line at This Point
by Lets Do That Again
Summary: Four comes to a mind-numbing realization about his, and his counterparts, related histories. (Linked Universe One-Shot).


The Timeline's Barely Even a Line at This Point

**The Legend of Zelda and all related media are property of Nintendo.**

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Four found himself in a rare moment of silence. It'd been a while since he had one of those. Not only did he have three—well, four—voices constantly rattling around in his head, but lately he'd been traveling with eight alternate versions of himself. Eight more voices snarking their opinions at one another. Not to say it was a problem; but he did enjoy those moments he could relax inside his own head.

Unfortunately, the silence left him time to think. Think beyond simple things like, 'What am I going to eat today?' or 'Where are we going next?'. Think on an issue which was on the back of all their minds, but something they made an effort to ignore at every available opportunity.

This issue niggled at his thoughts for a bit, until they could no longer be ignored. Thus, he sat up, rummaged through his pack for some ink and paper, and set about writing things down. And scratching things out. And writing things down. And scratching things out.

/+/+/+/+/

Wind furrowed his brow as he scanned the scene before him. Aside from physical features, another thing that him and his counterparts shared was a propensity to sleep-in (even Time, when he bothered to sleep). But that didn't mean they all slept equally. He stopped eating breakfast, looking around with a determined glare.

"What's wrong?" Wild asked, looking up from the fire.

"Where's Four?"

Hyrule stopped eating, tilting his head. "…Yeah, where is Four?"

"Leave it be," Time said, without looking up from his meal, as Wind got up from his seat to find Four. But Wind ignored him, too curious to do anything but seek out the shortest version of them.

When he pulled back Four's tent flaps, what he saw filled him with a great sense of unease.

Four was huddled in the far end of his tent, loose sheets of paper covered in illegible writing strewn haphazardly around him. The shortest Hero kept on muttering to himself, "No, no, no. Doesn't work. Doesn't fit!" and would swat the air around him.

Wind leaned back, looking over to the other by the fire. "Uh, guys!" He called out, "I think Four's broken."

"Let the man sleep," Time replied nonchalantly.

"What's broken?" Twilight yawned, poking his head out from the tent to the immediate right of Four's. Wind merely stepped aside, gesturing to Four.

Twilight lazily walked over, only balk at the sight of Four. "…Uh…I think Wind's right."

/+/+/+/+/

"Should we…be concerned?" Sky asked, wearily eyeing the group before him, surrounded by dozens of crumpled sheets of paper.

"Yes," Warriors bluntly stated.

"I think I've got some magic powder I can sprinkle them with," Legend muttered, looking through his pockets.

"You three!" the three Heroes flinched at Four's raspy yell, barely able to meet his bloodshot gaze. "Come here!" The trio reluctantly acquiesced, but not before Legend asked Time why he, of all people, was indulging this…madness.

Time shrugged wearily, "He's…got some good points." Sky, Legend, and Warriors grimaced, but crouched next to Four nonetheless.

Four nodded fervently, reaching over and picking up a stick. "Okay, so, _this_ is what we know to be true." He then wrote 'Sky', drew an arrow pointing down, and then wrote down 'Four'.

"Oh, for the—this again!" Legend shouted.

"Shh," Four, Wind, and Twilight shushed him. 'Four' glared darkly at Legend, before returning to his drawing. He drew an arrow pointing down, writing 'Time' just below that, and then another, final arrow, followed by the words, 'The Rest'.

"Did you just lump me in with 'The Rest'?" Warriors asked, offended.

"The specifics aren't important," Wild answered.

"Okay, we all agree that this is the bare bones timeline, right?" He didn't wait for any sort of affirmation, already drawing a circle around 'Four', 'Time', and 'The Rest'. "Now, everyone in this circle has fought Ganon at least once."

"So, what?" Sky began hesitantly, "You were the first one to fight Ganon? Is that what's driving you mad?"

"Yes!" Four shouted, making Sky jump. "Because here's the thing!" He drew a square around 'Time', "Time is the first one to face both Ganon the Man, and Ganon the Beast. I only faced the Beast."

"And?" Legend asked with a raised brow, "He reincarnated after you killed him, big whoop."

"Buuuuut~," Four sang, deranged, "I didn't kill Ganon. I was only able to seal him away." That got the trio's attention, "_And_, Vaati summoned Ganon. He didn't just show up out of nowhere, he wasn't ruling some forgotten realm, he was _summoned_!"

"…Go on," Legend said, reluctantly intrigued.

Four then began spouting off various other oddities—occasionally supported by the others, each word rising in pitch and speed. Like how aside from Sky and Four, everyone knew of Time (or in the case of Legend and Hyrule, a version of him the failed). Or how Ganon's Beast form was similar to the one Legend and Hyrule faced, but not any other form the others had faced.

When Four starting going blue in the face (and might have started speaking in tongues) Sky abruptly asked, "What about time-travel?" Everyone turned their attention to him. "I mean, he could have used time-travel to try and take over the world, right?" At that, everyone turned to stare at Time.

The eldest Hero shook his head, "Don't look at me! Ganondorf never had the power to travel through time when I fought him."

"So, when…" Twilight trailed off.

"Maybe it was with a Hero sometime between one of us?" Wild chimed in.

"Ugh, please no!" Wind groaned, dropping his head into his hands, "My head hurts enough already."

"Umm…" all present turned to Warriors, who was nervously biting his lip. "Er…when I faced Ganon, he had access to the Gate of Souls. It allowed him to summon monsters across time and space, and…mess with time."

Silence reigned as the other Heroes absorbed the information. Then, Legend raised his hand, "All in favor of blaming Warriors for this debacle?"

"Aye," seven Heroes sounded off.

"Yessir!" Four shouted, before falling on his back, passing out from exhaustion.

"Wait, what?"

"So long as we're in agreement," Time said, rising to his feet, "It's only fitting that his punishment be to clean up this mess."

Six voices gave their affirmation, and six Heroes left to break camp.

"Wha—hold on a minute!" Warriors stammered, whirling around to stare at the retreating Heroes. "That's not fair!" Alas, they ignored him. He growled lowly, glaring at the snoring Four, "Thanks a lot," he grumbled.

/+/+/+/+/

**A/N: jojo56830 has created an amazing thing, but having Four encompass ****_Minish Cap_****, ****_Four Sword_****, and ****_Four Sword Adventures_**** makes things…fun.**


End file.
